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Maintenance Menu
About Me
Congratulations, you’ve found the cheat code.
I’m easy to love when someone pays attention, plans ahead, and understands that consistency is sexier than guessing.
I don’t expect anyone to read my mind, so I made the study guide.
I appreciate thoughtful gestures, quality time, little surprises, and people who mean what they say. I love adventures, date nights, staying in with takeout, dressing up for no reason, and creating memories worth laughing about years later.
I believe relationships should feel fun, generous, affectionate, and easy—not confusing.
If you’re wondering what makes me smile, what I dream about, or how to spoil me properly, you’re in the right place.
Welcome to the owner’s manual.
My Philosophy
I don’t expect anyone to read my mind, so I made the study guide.
I believe relationships are supposed to feel easy. Thoughtfulness matters more than perfection, effort matters more than money, and consistency is the sexiest thing a person can bring to the table.
I love adventures, dressing up for no reason, staying in with takeout and movies, laughing until we cry, and building a life that feels beautiful and fun.
I am incredibly easy to make happy when I feel appreciated, pursued, and cared for.
My Experience
I come fully equipped with:
• Constant entertainment
• Professional level dog-mom energy
• An appreciation for thoughtful gifts
• Excellent travel companion abilities
• Fancy date enthusiasm
• Equal excitement for five-star dinners and Taco Bell at midnight
• Emotional support and occasional life coaching
• Unmatched hype-woman skills
• A little chaos, but the cute kind
My Services
Included with your Missy subscription:
✔️ Unlimited cuddles
✔️ Sexy time (terms and conditions apply)
✔️ Festival and concert companion
✔️ Boat day enthusiast
✔️ Plus-one for weddings and events
✔️ Plant consultation services
✔️ Dog mom adventures with Bentley and Barkley
✔️ Professional passenger princess
✔️ Random facts and unnecessary trivia
✔️ Looking pretty in photos you post
Testimonials
Bentley Theodore Longbody
★★★★★
“Would recommend. She gives excellent treats and provides luxury accommodations.”
Barkley
★★★★★
“Zero complaints. Excellent snuggle package.”
Former Boyfriends
★★★☆☆
“Still obsessed.”